Thursday, July 28, 2011

The match game

Since I’ve been writing this blog, one thing has been said to me repeatedly: you’re so open and honest.

But—to be honest—there’s one thing I’ve held out on discussing.


Even now, I’m cringing a bit to think of talking about it to you guys. Still, I think it’s something I need to talk about.

Dating totally freaks me out. Totally. How can I be in my mid- (OK, lateish) 30s and afraid to date? The answer, I think, is that I’m just out of practice. Which seems completely embarrassing.

For the past several years, food was my significant other. Who needs a boyfriend when you’re stuffing your face with mashed potatoes and frozen pizza? As I ate, I built a literal wall with my body that kept people out and kept me from getting hurt.

I’m one of the last of my friends to get married. I’m a professional bridesmaid. A committed godmother and a happy “aunt” to my friends’ kids. But I want that for myself. And I’m not getting any younger.

When I started losing weight, I told myself I would attempt dating when I got to a certain weight. Yeah, I passed that about 25 pounds ago. Tick tock.

With dating, much like my weight loss, I’ve spent most of my life waiting for something to happen to me, rather than trying to make it happen myself. Waiting for my weight to drop. Waiting for the perfect guy to sweep me off my feet.

I learned, though, that much like the Good Witch told Dorothy, I had the power to change my life all along. It has changed. But I’m not as confident about finding someone with whom to share it.

How do you explain to someone that the reason you haven’t dated in so long is because you were too busy wallowing in the middle of a food addiction? (Don’t worry, I wouldn’t actually say that.)

Then there are the normal fears. If I do the online dating thing and then meet people in person, will I be pretty enough? Good enough? I wish I could start thinking of this in terms of it being my choice. But I spent so much time in the depths of self-despair, it’s still hard for me to think of myself as worthy. I guess that’s where I need to start.

I may or may not keep you guys posted on this. This is a tough (REALLY) tough subject for me to tackle, but I am trying to work through it.

You guys just cross your fingers for me, OK?

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Raindrops on roses, whiskers on kittens, etc.

It’s time for another installment of Erika’s favorites! Aren’t you super excited? Here are just a few things I’ve been loving lately.
Just FYI, the packaging has changed a bit.

Van Egg Rolls
I had forgotten how much I love these yummy egg rolls. They are really low in fat (and WW points, for my fellow ridders-of-weight) and they’re delicious. I’ve found them in Kroger and Walmart (in both stores, they’re near the premade foods in the deli section). The low-fat veggie and low-fat shrimp are the lowest in calories and points—and best of all? They’re huge!

Hebrew National 97 Percent Fat-free Beef Franks
There’s just something about summer that makes me crave hot dogs. You’ll certainly never find me at a Braves game without one. I mean, I’m an American girl, through and through. That’s why I love these yummy dogs. They’re fantastic. And they don’t even taste low-fat. Best of all, when it comes to nutritional info, they’re doggone (too much?) awesome. Only 40 calories per serving. And only 1 measly WW Point Plus. Yum. I like to eat them either without a bun, or on one of my favorite Ole tortillas.

Weight Watchers Smart Ones Pepperoni Pizza Minis
My friend Leslie turned me onto these. Each box comes with two servings, which is four mini-pizzas. They are so tasty—they remind me a little of school cafeteria pizzas (am I the only who loved those?) and I love getting four at a time. I’m never without these. They can be a little tough to find, so check different stores.

Marketside Three-Olive Hummus
I’ve often sung of my love for hummus. But I have officially found my favorite. Walmart’s store brand, Marketside, makes this fantastic Three-Olive Hummus. It’s rich, yet healthy, and even has little bits of olives in it. Yum.

Grilled veggies
While I can barely keep anything alive, I am lucky to have friends with incredibly green thumbs. Two in particular, my college roommate, Lange, and my coworker, Brant, have both gifted me with zucchini and squash. Usually with such vegetables, I roast them at a high temperature with some olive oil and salt and pepper. Well, this is Atlanta, and with a heat index of more than 100 degrees, the last thing I want to do is crank my oven to 400 degrees. So I’ve busted out my George Forman grill for some veggie delights. I brush on some olive oil, a little garlic, and kosher salt and pepper onto slices and put them on the grill for a few minutes. They’re perfect. I’ve eaten grilled zucchini and squash for the past few nights and I’ve yet to tire of it.

The peaches this summer have been so good. I can’t get enough of them. They’re a perfect afternoon snack.

Fill me in: What are you loving lately?

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Red, white and free

I hate putting away clothes. It’s always been my least favorite chore.

I can remember my mom would leave my laundry on my bed (so spoiled) for me to put away. I didn’t even have to wash my own clothes, yet I’d still whine about the hardships of putting things on hangers and in drawers.

Though I do my own laundry now, the amount of complaining I do about putting away my clothes hasn’t changed all that much. I still hate it.

But lately, putting away clothes hasn’t just been a bothersome task. It’s been almost impossible.

Since I started losing weight, I’ve gone down more than five sizes. And when you add the new clothes I’ve bought into the mix, well, let’s just say my closet and drawers are overloaded.

So what better time to purge my old stuff than Independence Day weekend? I’ve been thinking about it a lot, but Sunday morning, I got up and just started throwing stuff into bags. I stopped thinking sentimentally and started thinking practically. Sure, that dress was super cute, and I wore it to some memorable events, but it’s a size 24. I’m never going back there.


It went surprisingly quickly. And with each item that went into the trash bag, I cleared out a little more space—in my closet and in my life.

In all, I filled six huge trash bags with clothes that no longer fit. And just to ensure I wouldn’t keep them, I drove them straight to my local Goodwill.

See ya never, old life.
It’s amazing how much better I feel now that there is room for my new stuff. Out with the old, in with the new, they say. It's how I'm trying to live my life, too.

Independence Day, indeed.