Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Scale or nonscale?

Every Tuesday, our leader Dee opens our Weight Watchers meetings the same way:

"Do we have any scale or nonscale victories to celebrate?"

Scale victories are obvious. My fellow members will say "I got rid of 2.5 pounds this week." And we all cheer and clap. Scale victories are awesome.

Nonscale victories take on a wide range. "I worked out every day last week." "I avoided the tortilla chips when I ate at a Mexican restaurant." "I got into a smaller size." Nonscale victories can be awesome, too.

Quite frankly, it's been a while since I've had a scale victory. And lately, it's been difficult to find my nonscale victories, too. So when I'm feeling like this, I try to remember how far I've come. Here's something that recently reminded me of that.

The best part about my older apartment complex is the pool. It's a lovely, two-story, lagoon-style pool with waterfalls and a little island in the middle. I remember when I first moved in, thinking how nice it would be if I felt comfortable enough to hang out there during the summer.

I spent a little time there last summer, always on the lookout for the place where I'd be most hidden. I'd certainly never get chatty with anyone. And I'm a chatty person.

This year, though, as soon as the weather was warm enough, I was out there. Talking to people, meeting my neighbors. A few weeks ago, I spent two hours talking to a guy and we exchanged numbers to hang out for future pool time. No, it wasn't like THAT (don't get excited), but it made me think of how much I tried to hide myself before. And how much more true to myself I am by not hiding.

On the beach during Memorial Day weekend. Yeah, I'm posting a bathing suit picture. I'm calling that a nonscale victory.
It isn't so much that I look any different than last year, but I think I've come to a place of acceptance with where I am right now. It's not where I want to be forever. But it's also not where I was. 

And I'd say that's a nonscale victory. Right?

I know I've been sporadic at best. Thank you to those of you who have checked in on me. While I know I've said it before, I promise to be better about blogging. From now on, twice a week. No exceptions. Hold me to that, OK?

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Juicy juice makes me less than 100 percent

Hi all. So I know I keep apologizing for slacking. I really need to figure out a schedule of blogging and stick to it. Every Tuesday and Thursday, perhaps? I'll work on that.

Today is a good day. Why? Because I'm eating food. And food is good.

It turns out I'm a bit of a masochist. Sunday morning, I started the Arden's Garden two-day juice detox. Did I mention that Sunday I was at the Ronald? Yeah. See? Masochist.

I did this detox two other times--both years ago, when I was desperate to lose weight and hoping for something to kick-start me into being serious about it. This time, I did it less for the weight loss and more for the mental aspects of it.

Because I've been feeling a little out of control lately, I thought that doing the juice fast would remind me that I do, in fact, have self-control. Two days of juice and water only is a mental test I needed.

I brought my trusty gallon of juice to the Ronald and started drinking it Sunday morning. The juice is just distilled water with fresh grapefruit, lemons and oranges. There's no sweetness to that stuff. But it's not terrible. I went downstairs and someone was cooking bacon. I went back upstairs.

The first day wasn't bad. I was not tempted to eat any of the goodies at the House, though I did stay out of the kitchen for the most part. Sunday night, our meal donors brought way too much pizza. I had to put it all away, storing the slices in freezer bags. I stayed strong.

I slept super hard Sunday night and woke up with a monster headache Monday morning. I remember the first time I did this fast, at about 2 p.m. the second day, I got this total feeling of euphoria. I never wanted food again. I felt so good.

I didn't get that feeling this time. I had a perpetual headache and felt overall pretty tired. I woke up this morning feeling much better, though. Maybe because I knew I could eat real food. Plus, I did lose a few pounds, so that's something.

I'm hoping to take the effects of the detox and stretch them out for the next few weeks. I'm hoping this is the jump-start I so desperately need. As always, I'll keep you guys posted.