Friday, March 19, 2010

The only thing we have to fear is…everything?

As I have mentioned a few times, I have been a victim of my own fear.

I’ve allowed myself to be afraid of so many things—rejection, change, challenges, even success.

But I’m finding that the more honest I am with all of you and with myself, the less I let my fear hold me back. Am I still afraid sometimes? Of course. But I’m not going to let that stop me anymore.

So in my attempt at facing my fear head-on, I’m trying new things. A few weeks ago, I went to my first Zumba class. For those of you who don’t know about Zumba, it’s a Latin dance-inspired fitness class. I waited for the class to start, a little panicked about what I was getting myself into—would I make it through the class without passing out? Could I do the moves? Would other people laugh at me?

But I decided I didn’t care. I got up there with the other ladies, shook what my mama gave me and unleashed my inner Shakira. Er, sort of. Sure, I had to modify some of the moves to suit me, and sometimes I went right when everyone went left. But I laughed it off and kept going. And then I went back the next week. Look out, J.Lo.

Tonight I’m starting something else that scares me—personal training. I have finally faced another major fear of mine—the gym—thanks to finding a place where I feel truly comfortable (shout out to Ladies Workout Express in Toco Hills). But now it’s time for me to take that to the next level. So tonight, I have my first appointment with my personal trainer and will be meeting with her about three times a week for the next few months. I’m excited and hopeful about how this will change my body and my mind.

And yes, I’m nervous. A bit terrified, actually. But what I’ve found is that overcoming that fear—trying things I never would have dreamed I could do, makes the end result much more satisfying.


Anonymous said...

I second your shout out to Ladies Workout Express. They are wonderful and Becky is the best. She is very encouraging and when I say I had to modify something or that I'm tired she says that's ok as long as you try. I'm loving it and thanks for your stories they keep me going.

Leanne said...

There is something about being nervous that gives me energy. I think it does that for a lot of people.

Have you ever heard this saying?
Fear is:

F - False
E - Evidence
A - Appearing
R - Real

It reminds me that what I think is so bad is usually not really so bad. My fear seems to be worsened by how terrible I imagine it could be.

I'm proud of you for fighting your fears. You're a great winner! I'm excited and hopeful for you, Erika! Have fun and be happy!

Anonymous said...

Have fun personal training! I know you will love it - and way to get out there and conquer your fears!!!! You are in inspiration to us all, Erika! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Proud doesn't even big to describe... : )

Anonymous said...

WAY TO GO! Keep up the GREAT work! And ditto about Ladies Workout Express. One of the most nurturing environments to work-out in.

Anonymous said...

Good for you, Erika.

I wish we have a Zumba class here at Children's.

Anonymous said...

I learned a few years ago to open up about things I had always kept to myself. Not only was it liberating, like you, I found that I wasn’t alone. Keep going and best of luck on your journey!