One down

52 weeks of healthy eating.
365 days with a new mindset.
12 months of workouts.

One year of lessons.

On Jan. 26, 2010, I began a journey to change my life. I walked into the Weight Watchers open house with so many hopes and wishes. So much shame and guilt. So much discouragement. So little self-confidence.

A year later I am 90 pounds lighter (yeah, you read that right. I finally hit my 90 pounds yesterday) and a little bit wiser.

At least I’d like to think so.

So what have I learned since last Jan. 26? Here are just a few highlights.

• As clichéd as it sounds, life really is a marathon and not a sprint. I haven’t fallen down and gotten up this much since I first learned to ride a bike.
• Sometimes big goals seem insurmountable. But sometimes small goals actually do seem possible.
• Secrets and shame will keep you stuck in the dark. 
• When you share from your heart, people you never expected will support you when you most need it.
• Kale really is good. I promise.
• Every step toward wholeness erases a little bit of chaos. One day at a time.
• Working out does not, in fact, equal death (OK, except for lunges).
• Seriously, eating out of the trashcan is not worth it.
• The ego is a powerful creature. The negative one and the positive one.
• Taking a compliment is hard, yo.
• The kindness of strangers can change your life.
• Diet Coke is a sexy, impossible-to-resist siren.
• .6 pounds can be both triumphant and devastating.
• Freedom from addiction is really, really awesome.

The lessons I’ve learned are endless. And continuing. I remember when I lost my first 5 pounds. I whined about how many of those I needed to get to my goal. And a wise, wonderful friend (Hi, Kev!) told me to picture where I’d be in a year if I kept earning those 5-pound stars. It was hard to imagine then. It felt so out of my reach. But he was right.

Though I’m not finished by any stretch of the imagination, I have hope for the first time. I am no longer chained to food. I am no longer constrained by my body from the things I want to do.

And that feels like success to me.

My good friend Carla's birthday is Jan. 25. These two photos were taken at her birthday parties, last year and last night, respectively.