Thursday, December 22, 2011


It's been about a week since my surgery. Overall? I'm doing much better than I expected.

I know I told you guys I was a little nervous before my surgery. I might have understated that. I didn't sleep for two nights before I went to the hospital. However, by the time I got into the pre-op area the morning of the procedure I was a zen master. Calm, cool and sort of collected.

I kept telling myself I had chosen to do this. That this was going to change my life in so many ways. That helped. So did the happy drugs the nurses gave me. The procedure went well and I spent one night in the hospital (Side note: At Piedmont Hospital, they play "Brahms' Lullaby" every time a baby is born. Sweet. But in my post-anesthesia brain, the first time I heard it, I thought it was the hospital's way of saying it was time for patients to go to sleep--a call for lights out. I caught on by the third time I heard it.).

I stayed at my brother and sister-in-law's, who took amazing care of me, for the first few days. My dad stopped by and made me grilled cheese sandwiches that tasted like my childhood. And I tried to rest and be OK with other people taking care of me. So far, this has proven to be the hardest thing for me. Even in the hospital I kept apologizing to the nurses when I had to call them.

Today I had my first post-op appointment with my surgeon, who cleared me to drive (and most important--shower) and told me everything was healing as it should be.

The pain has been minimal, but the sitting around part has been brutal. I'm not used to being this sedentary. But I'm trying to take it easy, because I know that's what will help me heal.

I have to express my gratitude to my amazing family and friends who have stopped by, brought me food, taken me to lunch, and sent me notes of well-wishes before and after my surgery. I feel so blessed by so many in my life.

I do wonder if I would be doing this well if I weren't so active. I guess I will never know. But I'm happy so far and feeling no regrets.

I wish all of you the happiest of holidays. Thank you for all the positive energy, good thoughts and prayers you've sent me. They've really helped.


CD said...

Soo glad you are doing well! Sounds like you're really taking good care of yourself - enjoy this time off!!! Are you in pain? Sore?


Kellynn18 said...

Well, how about that? In this amazing journey you have been on, you have managed to learn how to care for your whole self. That's pretty awesome, Erika...and a lot to be proud of. Keep taking good care of yourself (and allowing others to do so too), and have a very Merry Christmas!

Anonymous said...

Even if you are feeling good faster than expected, don't underestimate the time your body needs to heal itself....even if you are bored out of your mind and ready to jump back into normal activity. We want you well and healthy!

Dawn M. Stark said...

Erika- Merry Christmas! Glad to hear you're healing well. I'd love to come take you out to lunch or dinner. I'll call when I get back home from Florida.

Remember this will only happen once so allow yourself to be cared for by others.... I know it's hard but you deserve it!

Love you girlie!

Anonymous said...

A long time ago I was sitting in the waiting room at a Toyota dealership waiting for my car to be finished (oil change).
I sat in a chair and glanced at this woman sitting by herself. She was so beautiful to me. She too was very very overweight but beautiful nonetheless. I wanted so bad to go over to her and tell her that but, I didn't. I have regreted that decision to this day. It was gorgeous and I'll bet she probably would have liked to hear that from a perfect stranger.
I see in your face almost what I saw in hers. A very beautiful woman and your loss of weight has really brought it out. More importatly you are a very beautiful person in the inside.
I know exactly what you are going through because, I too have lost a lot of weight and know all too well the shame and humiliation it brings. I have missed weddings, visiting relatives from Europe, even a woman I have known for 11 years that I have avoided meeting because of how I saw myself in the mirror. I lost her 3 months ago through a text message: "I met someone. We are dating."
It hurt so bad that I could not eat, sleep or think. THAT was my "hit rock bottom" moment. I began to eat better, excercise and more importantly feel better about myself. I turned a personal heartbreak into something I had needed to do for a long time.
I will always have regrets about what happened. I miss her dearly to this day but I do things now I would not have done a short 3 months ago. In addition to the weight loss I have gained my freedom back. I am no longer self conscious about who I am. I no longer let food lead me. I have thrown out a lot of clothes and found clothes, that over the years have worked their way to the back of the closet that now fit.
Reading your journey has made me your #1 fan. A beautiful woman on the inside is now a stunning woman on the outside. Not a bad combo if I say so myself.
Welcome to a better life. May you teach others by your journey.