No longer an option

When I first started Weight Watchers, I never allowed myself to skip a meeting or not weigh in when I attended one.

How times have changed.

In the past few months, I've gotten more and more lax about this personal rule. Feel like a binge on Monday? Sure, I just won't weigh in Tuesday. Ate too much over the weekend? Maybe I'll be "too busy" to attend my Weight Watchers meeting.

The reason Weight Watchers has worked for me is accountability. Knowing I have to weigh in every Tuesday and face my leader and fellow members is a helpful tool in keeping me honest and on track. But, like a lot of things in my life lately, I lost sight of that.

So last week, I walked into my meeting. I knew it would be bad. I hadn't weighed in in a month and I knew the results wouldn't be pretty. But I stood on that scale and made a promise to my leader, Dee, and myself:

Not weighing in didn't used to be an option, and it's no longer an option anymore.

I tried to take my accountability measures a little further. I told a friend and fellow Weight Watchers member to hold me to it. If I tell you I'm too busy to go to the meeting, I told her, ask me if I'm telling the truth.

Now sure, there may some Tuesdays I'm out of the office and can't attend my normal meeting. If that's the case, I'll commit to trying to get to a meeting in the community.

In other words, I'm pretty serious about this.

I've let a lot of stuff get in my way in the past year, and I've decided it's time to be selfish. Focus on myself. Move forward with my goals that I've worked so hard to try to achieve.

Now for the tough part. The stats.

My greatest total weight loss was 130.8, which I achieved last November. My total now is 119.4 (which I got today after losing .8). A little more than an 11-pound difference. I'm not proud, but I'm not defeated. I'm trying to remind myself that I've kept more than 100 pounds off for more than a year, and that's something to celebrate. But I don't want to be the person that puts it all back. I won't be that person.

To further keep me accountable, I'm going to post a short entry every Tuesday afternoon with my weight loss/(hopefully not) gain for the week. If I don't do it, call me out.

Because not reaching my ultimate goals is no longer an option.